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7 late-nite jokes about Obama, Snowden and the NSA scandal

by Brett M. Decker | Posted on

A new survey by Quinnipiac University reports that only 34 percent of Americans view National Security Agency leaker Edward Snowden as a traitor to our country. One can tell a lot by the company someone keeps, and since fleeing from the Land of the Free, this guy has been hiding out in China and Russia and batting his eyelashes for a visa to other lovely human-rights hellholes run by commies like Cuba, Ecuador and Venezuela. As Rare’s newest editorial asks, “Would he go there out of desperation or in search of kindred spirits?” The Quinnipiac poll shows that 55 percent of Americans think the Snowden kid is all right. Here are 7 unclassified barbs that 100 percent of the nation can laugh at:

 

“No one knows exactly where NSA whistleblower Edward Snowden is hiding at the moment. He released a statement that says, ‘No one will find me unless some big-mouth jerk starts blabbing.’” – Conan O’Brien

 

“The term ‘Big Brother’ is from George Orwell’s book ‘1984’ – where everyone’s watched over by a network of cameras called Big Brother. I’ve never understood why Orwell chose that phrase for somebody watching you all the time. Isn’t that more like ‘Creepy Uncle’?” – Craig Ferguson

“President Obama’s approval rating has dropped eight points over the past month, down to 45 percent, his lowest rating in more than a year and a half. But Obama is vowing to find out whose approval he’s lost, track them down using their email and phone records, and personally win them back.” – Jay Leno

 

“During the summer, all scandals will be reruns. That’s a programming reminder from the White House.” – David Letterman

“NSA leaker Edward Snowden somehow managed to get out of the U.S. with all their information. Now where is he? He’s in Russia now, going to be in Ecuador or wherever. He remains at large. Now what are the odds out of 350 million Americans, the only one the government wasn’t watching was him?” – Jay Leno

“The latest search for Jimmy Hoffa has been called off. The FBI now says they called off the search because the NSA said it would be too difficult to find Jimmy Hoffa because he hasn’t made a phone call since 1975.” – Jay Leno

“In the middle of all these scandals, President Obama got some good news today. The IRS ruled that he can write off the first half of his second term as a total loss.” – Jay Leno

 

Brett M. Decker is Editor-in-Chief of Rare. Follow him on Twitter @BrettMDecker

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