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“Audience, the only way I know how to clean a scarf is to stick it in a drawer for six months.”

We’ve all been there, Steven.

Stephen Colbert decided to let his audience in on more of his deepest, darkest secrets in the latest installment of “Audience Confessions,” in which he places the viewers on the other side of the confessional booth and pours out his soul.

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While they might not be sins, Colbert feels bad about them, which is what really counts. From his lack of exercise, to his butter-licking habits, to his outrageous driving habits, he’s got a boatload of misdeeds for which to seek penance. Join us in forgiving Colbert so he can start 2017 off right.


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