Rare Humor

What’s next for Rob Ford?

, Rare Staff

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Toronto’s infamous crack-smoking mayor really screwed himself this time.

A week after Rob Ford told reporters that he smoked crack in a drunken stupor, the Canadian politician admitted to City Council members Wednesday that he had also purchased the drug within the past two years. A 500-page court report also details Ford’s reckless behavior, which ranges from alcohol abuse to mistreatment of his staffers.

Ford still refuses to resign, yet he has lost the trust of many of his constituents as well as his colleagues in the City Council. It appears that the Ford’s career in politics is, for all intents and purposes, over. So, what’s next for the crack-coddling Canuck? Thankfully, we’ve come up with a few options.

Football coach

In his spare time, Ford coaches the Don Bosco Eagles. Maybe he should consider making a career out of it.

Dancing with the Stars

For a big guy, Ford can really get down. Plus, this could be a springboard to a career in television.

Professional poker player

How can you not clean house with a poker face like this?

Lobbyist

Say what you will about Ford, but he really knows how to appeal to the people. The guy could sell cigarettes to a lung cancer patient.

Dos Equis guy

Most interesting man in the world? Hands down.

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