“Hello, my name’s Jeff,” said Kate McKinnon in a southern drawl, costumed like some kind of Keebler elf going to Sunday services. “Jeff Sessions. I’m the attorney general of the whole United States,” saying United States like “U-ni-ted States.”
When NBC’s Saturday Night Live was on break for three weeks during the Trump Administration, we never really knew what we were going to get. Like in this SNL Forrest Gump-inspired sketch, where Jefferson Beauregard Sessions (say the Beauregard like a frightened extra in “Gone with the Wind” for effect) basically holds court at a bus stop with a box of chocolates, each bus that passes bringing a new seat-mate. Mckinnon’s Sessions impersonation with a hint of Tom Hanks’ character, Forrest Gump, made for this hilarious skit “Jeff Sessions Gump Cold Open.”
Attorney General Jeff Sessions explains his “bad week” in great detail, starting from President Trump’s speech to a joint session (“We were all as happy as a monkey with a peanut machine!”) and going all downhill from there (“Then I went to bed, I got 800 messages on phone alerts saying I was a sneaky little liar!”). He rants about missing a seemingly legless Kellyanne Conway, how he misses President Donald Trump (“I miss you Donnie!”), and how he didn’t know that this one guy he was talking to was Russian until he found out he was a Russian ambassador.
But then a certain Russian leader, a shirtless Vladimir Putin to be exact, gets off the bus, claiming “this meeting never happened,” Sessions confirms “I wasn’t going to remember it anyway!” Fist bump. America. He never talked to the Russians, remember? Then, host Octavia Spencer makes an appearance as her own character Minny Jackson, from the Help, telling Mckinnon she’s from a different movie, and then handing him a pie that she made.
Editor’s note: This article was originally published on March 5, 2017.