Dog Sex Toy Facebook/The American Kennel Club
Facebook/The American Kennel Club

A dog walker in England had an embarrassing chase on her hands after Charlie, the labrador she was walking, found a sex toy on their walk and started running around playing with it.

The male dog found a massive silicone dildo on the ground and immediately turned it into a chew toy. Despite dog walker Klara Robson’s pleas with Charlie to please stop running around public with a giant adult toy, the dog gleefully hopped around the park with the masturbation tool in his mouth.

A Dog Will Do What a Dog Wants to Do

Robson actually didn’t even realize Charlie had a dildo in his mouth at first. She sent a picture to Charlie’s owner to show how much fun he was having. Then, finally, she realized her mistake and the chase was on.

For what it’s worth there could have been way worse “sexual wellness” gadgets this dog could have found. Something with suction modes could have really done some damage. A sex doll would have been even more conspicuous. A silicone vagina would’ve just been weird. A “DoggieLoverDoll” (which is a real thing) would have been too on the nose. Anything made to stimulate the clitoris could have been swallowed. And at least it wasn’t a rechargeable rabbit vibrator or some sort of pulsating massager or stimulator? You definitely don’t want your pup chewing into batteries and stuff. A dog swallowing battery acid feels like the exact opposite of hitting the g-spot.

All’s Well That Ends Well

Eventually, Robson was able to get the discarded masturbator away from Charlie and go on with her day, though of course not before posting about it on social media. Obviously, it was a hit.

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Rob Fox About the author:
Rob Fox is a writer, comedian, and producer based in Austin, TX. God made him left-handed to hide his own averageness from him.
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