Advertisement
Couple Beat Thieves with Bats Visalia Police Department
Visalia Police Department.

A Visalia, California couple has been arrested on suspicion of assault with a deadly weapon and conspiracy for some pretty unorthodox YouTube pranking, if you can call it that (the police prefer the assault with a deadly weapon tag, for what it’s worth).

Corey Cornutt, 25, and Savannah Grillot, 29, are in boiling hot legal water because, apparently, they had the brilliant idea to purposely leave a bicycle unattended in their front yard, wait for thieves to come steal it, and then run out as the thieves were attempting to make off with the bike and beat the crap out of them with baseball bats. And, of course, because this is 2020, film the entire thing and post it to the internet, hence why they’re now in jail.

Turns out that manufacturing vigilante justice for likes is a crime.

Honestly, prosecute the crap out of these two. We’re ten days into 2020 and this is already a finalist for dumbest crime of the year. What was the endgame here? Get famous for putting petty thieves into comas? The fact that it was all for a YouTube channel makes this worthy of a life sentence, really. Anyone who bashes in someone’s skull and then shouts something like, “You got served… JUSTICE!” to camera deserves a life of solitary confinement.

Of course, these two could also just be psychos. That’s totally possible. Maybe they’re really into Dexter but don’t have the balls — or means, or intelligence — to hunt serial killers so instead they just lazily lure half-assed thieves into their yard and then attempt to bludgeon them to death. And then, again, add some Gen Z dipshittery to it all by posting it to YouTube.

Watch: An Armed Psycho Robbed a Kid’s Lemonade Stand But There’s a Happy Ending

Rob Fox About the author:
Rob Fox is a writer, comedian, and producer based in Austin, TX. God made him left-handed to hide his own averageness from him.
View More Articles

Stories You Might Like