Saturday night’s fight between Conor McGregor and Floyd Mayweather was one of the sporting events of the decade. Unfortunately, it played at around midnight on the east coast, which means that a lot of people were already asleep by the time the two fighters squared off in the ring.
Thankfully, Ozzy Man wasn’t passed out when the highly-anticipated fight played out, and he’s offering his play-by-play of all the action. He begins narrating before the fight even starts, as Mayweather approaches the ring wearing “a beautiful hand-knitted ski mask and an ‘Assassin’s Creed’ gown.” And once the action begins, there’s no color commentator in the sport who can match the foul-mouthed Australian’s explanation of the battle. He shines with quotes like “and now it turns into a schoolyard fight, ‘Gimme your lunch money, gimme your lunch money'” and “[McGregor] looks as wobbly on his feet as I did last time I was in Las Vegas.”