If you’ve ever had a gym membership, chances are you also tried to cancel that membership at one point.
And you almost definitely didn’t succeed, because gyms are evil. Once you join the gym, there’s no un-joining the gym. They own you.
But one of Reddit’s greatest minds has found a way to cancel his membership and stick it to the company who made it so difficult to cancel in the first place.
Mastrrbasser needed to cancel his membership to Planet Fitness. But Planet Fitness makes it as difficult as possible, and required the man to write a certified letter to request his freedom. Which he did — in the form of humorous love letter.
He kicks off the letter by letting the gym know his decision to leave was not an easy one:
“Certain events in my life have put me in a different place, and while it was one of the more taxing decisions I’ve made as of late, it is the right one,” he wrote, adding that the purpose of the letter is to “end my relationship with Planet Fitness Orange.”
He didn’t blame them though. He made it clear that he was responsible for the breakdown of the relationship. He’ll always remember the good times.
“I still think fondly of you, and the time we spent together as I drive by one of your many locations,” the letter reads. “Sometimes, when I’m alone, I even throw on one of my old ‘power-pop workout’ playlists and feel the rush of our past course through me as if we were still one, holding hands with your elliptical machine, and gingerly brushing my sweaty bangs out of my face as I huff and puff in a tumultuous vortex of sweat and endorphins.”
Truly, this will go down among the pantheon of classic break ups. Here’s looking at you, kid.