A Security Guard Was Fired For Filming Himself Farting at Work

Art. What is it? Can it be a glistening, fat, mustachioed man being filmed in an extreme close up, reacting to the sounds of gas being released from his colon, shooting through his sphincter, and reverberating off his ample ass cheeks? Yes. Obviously. Just watch this video.

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That [hand clap emoji] is [hand clap emoji] art [hand clap emoji]. If someone can sculpt The Statue of Liberty out of dirty diapers — not a real thing (yet) but it sounds real — then surely this man documenting his at work flatulence qualifies.

The man, who has only identified himself as Doug, is a hospital security guard at a Florida (of course). His online alter ego, however, is Paul Flart. Because he is large. And a security guard. Like the popular(?) Kevin James character Paul Blart. But also this guy farts. You can consider him the fart authority.

As Officer Flart explained to Vice, he started doing this bit because he was bored at work and, presumably after unleashing an absolute banshee one day, he realized the lobby he was stationed in had some pretty great acoustics and good sound… for farting.

Soon Flart’s Instagram account went viral and his employers caught wind… of his wind. Flart, like so many of his farts, was pushed out. He even filmed himself being fired. It’s a serious conversation about farts. It’s worth a watch.

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Though Flart’s watch may be over, he says he intends to continue documenting his ass blasts on social media, wherever they may be. He has fans now. He is literally a worldwide hit, receiving messages from followers in countries like Holland and Germany. They tell Flart he makes their day.

And you don’t think this is art? The man creates it, and it inspires! It brings joy! If that’s not art, then nothing is. You snobs.

Editor’s note: This article was originally published on August 24, 2018.

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