Do you own a cat? Are you tired of constantly having to look at its butthole? Great news! You can now spangle your kitty’s sphincter with something called the Twinkle Tush.
No longer will you have to look your cat’s anus and wonder, “Why can’t her a-hole be as sparkly as my phone cover?” And it’s all thanks to Twinkle Tush, the company that wants the hole your cat shits from to be as ornate as a cathedral’s windows.
From the Twinkle Tush website:
Have you ever thrown a respectable cocktail party at your home only to have your feline family member come out and proudly display their uncovered rear? While kitty might enjoy showing off their brown eye, we’re sure your guests don’t like to see that one eyed monster while munching on their caviar. Give your cat some class. Hang a Twinkle Tush from their tail and cover that butt in bling.
The application of this butt bling is simple enough. Just loop back-end necklace around your cat’s tail and boom, everything is covered up and sparkly. But be sure to remember that the Twinkle Tush medallion has small parts so be mindful to keep any small children you have from eating out your cat, I guess. The website has this warning so it seemed like it was worth mentioning.
In fairness, Twinkle Tush is technically a gag gift. The website itself says so. But, also… it works. So it’s a gag gift like a practical application — like using liquid fart spray to ward off a mugger if your can of mace is empty and you’re too lazy to order more.
And really, gag or not a cat might genuinely enjoy have its asshole bedazzled. They’re cats. They know when they look fancy and when they look like trash. So why not spoil your cat a little bit. Buy a Twinkle Tush, put it in an old Tiffany’s box, and make your cat loathe you just a little bit less.