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Florida Woman Virtual Sex Lake County Sheriff's Office
Lake County Sheriff's Office

A Florida woman who was trying to graphically, albeit digitally, have an intimate moment or twelve with her incarcerated boyfriend ended up getting locked up herself after her kid walked in on her in the virtual love fest.

32-year-old Noelle Rascati was getting it on, pandemic style, with her 26-year-old partner Tathan Fields, who is serving a fifteen-year sentence. Things were pretty hot and heavy. Toys were involved. No doubt moans were moaned and absolutely filthy (but maybe also hot) things were shouted and muttered and gasped and exclaimed.

The only problem was that Rascati’s little kid was in the room the entire time, walking around and, hopefully, oblivious to what mom and the man making weird noises from the computer, were doing.

Rascati was arrested and charged with ‘engaging in lewd and lascivious conduct in the presence of a minor.’ It is unclear at this time if the man, Fields, faced charges for anything, though he was once previously charged for masturbating to the female instructor of a prison class, apparently.

A couple thoughts:

1. WHAT!?! How do you get off at all while your kid is walking around, let alone get off that hard? Who has an appetite for a buffet of dildos while their kid is skipping around singing the Paw Patrol theme song to themselves?

2. This goes for the guy too. I mean, I guess jail makes you kind of desperate, but still. A baby running around the room while you yank on yourself is like a hundred bridges too far. Prison can’t be that bad.

3. There’s at least a fifty percent chance that at some point in that little kid’s life they have picked up and played with a graphic as hell sex toy that their mom left laying around the kitchen or something.

Watch: Jerry Stiller?s Funniest Moments on ?Seinfeld?

Rob Fox About the author:
Rob Fox is a writer, comedian, and producer based in Austin, TX. God made him left-handed to hide his own averageness from him.
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