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Alcohol Soaked Pickles via Indiana Pickle Co.
via Indiana Pickle Co.

There are few things more likely to aggressively activate my gag reflex than a pickle shot. When forced to take one, it takes a full body and mind effort for me not to involuntarily purge like the possessed girl in The Exorcist. I love pickles, but pickle juice and vodka is basically bleach and pee as far as I’m concerned.

So I’m a little torn on these booze-soaked pickles from Indiana. Will they be good, like non-alcoholic pickles? Or poison, like pickle shots? I’m leaning toward the former, only because the pickles are still in solid form. Also, I sort of really want to say that I got wasted on a jar of pickles. And who knows, maybe after twelve moonshine soaked pickles, I’ll be able to chug the rest of the juice at the bottom of the pickle jar and not want to die afterward.

Indiana Pickle Co. sells three different types of alcoholic pickle jars and one type of boozy pickled carrots (this intrigues me). Three are soaked in beer, and one in moonshine. Not exactly your typical dill pickle.

Their Moonshine Pickle jar contains savory cucumbers paired with Hoosier Hooch Moonshine from Bear Wallow. These “slightly sweet, salty, & totally delicious” pickling pickles just might give you the hangover you never asked for. But don’t people use pickle juice to rehydrate and replenish?

Their Dragon Tails jar isn’t actually a pickle jar. Made with Upland Brewing Company’s Dragonfly IPA, these pickled carrot sticks are for the ones who love their Bloody Marys. Indiana Pickle Co. also recommends adding the “crunchy, sweet & spicy” pickled veggies to your charcuterie boards! Talk about spicing up your brunches!

The Pickle Chips jar contains briny “thick cut” pickle chips. This pickle brine concoction includes Sun King’s Wee Mac Scottish Ale, fresh dill, garlic cloves, and some spice. Indiana Pickle Co. reminds us that “these are not your grandmother’s pickles!

The Spicy Spears jar contains spicy pickle spears whose kick “complements Triton Brewing Company?s Rialsplitter IPA without overpowering the pickle flavor.” Sounds like a double whammy with the alcohol and the spice. I might have to moderate my intake on this one.

I’m actually all in on these Dragon Tails now. Pour me a Bloody Mary and drop like five of those things in there. I don’t want to see a single damn stalk of celery anywhere near my glass. BEER CARROTS ONLY!

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Editor’s note: This article was originally published April 15, 2020.

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Rob Fox About the author:
Rob Fox is a writer, comedian, and producer based in Austin, TX. God made him left-handed to hide his own averageness from him.
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