Are you a fan of cereal? Did you eat it in 2014? Well, sorry to be the bearer of bad news, but you might have eaten some cereal tainted with piss on it. Because some dumb dumb decided it would be a good idea to make us all eat his pee.
On May 24, a Tennessee man was sentenced to 10 months in prison for actually urinating on a Kellogg’s cereal conveyor belt at a Memphis facility. The US Attorney’s Office in Memphis sentenced 49-year-old Gregory Stanton, who pleaded guilty in November 2018 to tampering with consumer products and was ordered to pay $10,000 in restitution. According to the indictment, Stanton was a contract worker at the Kellogg’s plant in April 2014. He then decided to record himself peeing into a bucket, dumping “the content” into a Raisin Bran production line.
Stanton also recorded himself urinating into the actual production line a month later, posting the videos on the internet in 2016. Of course, Law Enforcement and the Food and Drug Administration investigated the case, but between you and I, I’m pretty sure the deed was already done by the time they got word of what had occurred. So yeah, could it be that we all had some oddly flavored cereal? Maybe? Honestly, who knows. Also, can you believe this guy is barely getting sentenced in 2019, despite him posting the video in 2016? Yikes.
Now, although I’m not a huge fan of Raisin Brand cereal, for those who are I am highly impressed, that doesn’t mean I’ll go and pee on them because I hate them. That to me is just ridiculous, this man must be seriously disturbed. What’s up with workers urinating on assembly lines while doing their job? What do they gain out of this? What is so wrong in their life that they feel the need to take revenge by peeing on everything they see?
I just don’t get it. Someone explain this to me, please. I say you give this man pee infested cereal as a punishment during his 10 years in prison. He deserves it.