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Kids Birthday Cake Explodes Reddit

Powdered sugar isn’t usually an ingredient you find dusted on the top of a birthday cake, and apparently, the reason for that is because it might lead to your face melting off? It turns out that any fine powder is flammable, actually — including powdered sugar. Putting it on a birthday cake, with lit candles that are meant to be blown out, may very well lead to some disastrous pyrotechnics, or at least a surprise eyebrow erasing.

According to a post in the Reddit thread r/chemicalreactiongifs from Reddit user u/Mass1m01973 one kid — and his family — found this out the hard way… with fire. (They were all fine though.)

Obviously, the important thing to do with this information is to figure out how to use it to trick and terrify your children. My vote is to spend years — years — telling your daughter that the 13th birthday is the “Witch’s Birthday.” That’s the day when a witch’s power manifests. Go deep in on this. When she says that no one else has ever heard of the Witch’s Birthday tell her it’s a family thing. A dark family secret. Put this shit on Wikipedia. Make a sketchy website detailing your family’s dark “history.”

On the night of birthday number 13, you bring out a cake absolutely loaded with powdered sugar on the top. What happens next is obvious. Your daughter blows out the candles. There’s an explosion. You scream in terror. Say something like, “No! No! The curse was supposed to be gone. We killed the last witch in our family!” Have someone else scream, “SHE’S A MONSTER!” Run out of the room. Run back in with a bucket labeled “holy water” and a machete. Dip the machete in the holy water. Apologize to your by now weeping and terrified daughter (because you’re about to kill her and cleanse the world of the evil of witches). Raise the machete to strike. Drop the machete. Act like you’re being force choked, Darth Vader style. Beg your daughter for mercy through strangled breaths. She’ll be insisting through tears she’s not doing anything, assuming she hasn’t fainted or sprinted out of the house already. Pass out.

Then, I don’t know, pop up and yell surprise, post the video on YouTube, get hella likes, and pay for her therapy forever? (I’m doing this.)

Watch: What Autumn Dessert Should You Make?

Rob Fox About the author:
Rob Fox is a writer, comedian, and producer based in Austin, TX. God made him left-handed to hide his own averageness from him.
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