A Florida sheriff’s department shared an unusual emergency call on their Facebook page after they said it left them “LOTO,” or “Laugh Our Tasers Off.”
“Driving while under the influence of alcohol or drugs is a serious crime. Innocent people are too often injured or killed from impaired drivers. DUI is not a laughing matter,” the Polk County Sheriff’s Office began, but this situation was a bit different.
The department introduced Michael Lester of Winter Haven, who they say on New Year’s Eve decided to do his part and call 911 when he saw something off. When asked what the emergency was, the caller responded, “I’m just drunk driving.”
The dispatcher attempted to get the caller’s location, but he couldn’t answer her because he was “too drunk.” The dispatcher then asked if he could pull over and managed to do so. He then offered up what details he could of his surroundings and the color of his vehicle in a compliant fashion.
That is, until the dispatcher asked his last name.
“I think I’m gonna go get something to eat. They can catch up with me,” he responded.
After being asked again, he inquired whether or not the information would be “helpful.” Then he said he didn’t “feel like” giving the information.
When asked what he’d done all night, the caller said he was driving around trying to get pulled over.
The remainder of the call follows a similar downward spiral.
The department then filled in the rest of the story:
Fortunately, Michael was stopped before anyone got hurt. Michael first told the deputy he had only two beers (standard drunk answer). Then he changed it to three or four (slightly more accurate). He also mentioned that he had only slept four hours in the past four days. Oh, and he also said that he had swallowed meth earlier, instead of smoking it.
Lester was later slapped with a DUI charge, as well as charges relating to driving on the wrong side of the road, improper use of the center lane and not wearing a seat belt.
To add further insult to injury, the department left Lester and his phone call with the following hashtags: #PCSO #DontDUI #Hello911ImHammered #SomebodyGetThisGuySomeBandAids #HeMethedUpBad #Best911CallWeveHeardInAWhile