Silke Jasso
“Welcome to the series finale of the WHCD!” began The Daily Show’s Hasan Minhaj, who added “or as will be known in a few weeks, #830287.”
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In a 25-minute speech, Minhaj trained his humor at the absent Donald Trump, his administration and the media assigned to cover him in equal measure.
Minhaj conceded that no one wanted the job of hosting a White House Correspondents’ Dinner without the president, turning it into a joke. “I would say it is an honor to be here, but that would be an alternative fact. It is not. No one wanted to do this. So of course, it lands in the hands of an immigrant.”
He added a shout-out to recently passed Don Rickles, who he said “died just so you wouldn’t ask him to do this gig.” He also called Rickles “the only Donald with skin thick enough to take a joke like that.”
Though Minhaj insisted that he was asked not to target the administration, he did, adding that while the president normally performs at the dinners, “he has done far too much bombing this month.”
He asked after absent members of the administration, including Jeff Sessions and Ivanka Trump, before tearing into the media, many of whom were present for roasts.
“Even if you guys groan,” he told the crowd, “I’ve already hired Kellyanne Conway. She’s gonna go on TV on Monday and tell everyone I killed. It doesn’t matter.”
Minhaj stated that it was the “golden age of lying,” and that journalists had managed to become “public enemy number one” next to normal-length ties and ISIS. But he added that media had been “far from perfect,” especially around the last election, and watching the looks on anchors’ faces on Election Night was like “walking into a Panera Bread and finding out your sixth grade teacher has a part-time job there. It was like what?!”
He closed by remarking about how the job had changed for most of those present.
“It was all fun and games with Obama, right? You were covering an adult who could speak English. You’re covering President Trump now,” he said, comparing it to watching “a bunch of stripper cops” having to solve a murder.
“You guys have to be more perfect than ever! You are how the president gets his news. When one of you messes up, he blames your entire group. Now you know how it feels to be a minority.”
