Rare News Desk
Yesterday, we set our clocks back one hour. However, the end of Daylight Savings Time means more than just an extra hour of sleep. Here are six signs that Daylight Savings Time is a right wing conspiracy.
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1. All About the Benjamin (Franklin, that is)
Daylight savings time was the idea of our great Founding Father, Benjamin Franklin. He first mentioned it in a letter he sent from Paris in 1784.
Who loves our founding fathers more than those weirdos on the right?
2. All About the benjamins (money, that is)
The big selling point for daylight savings time was the money that it would save. In that same letter, Franklin estimated that Paris would save 128 million candlelight hours in a single season if people simply woke up earlier. He wrote that “If I had not been awakened so early in the morning, I should have slept six hours longer by the light of the sun, and in exchange have lived six hours the following night by candlelight; the latter being a much more expensive light than the former.”
In 1907, Englishman William Willet published a pamphlet called “The Waste of Daylight.” In this pamphlet, he calculated that shifting the clocks to align with daylight would lead to a savings of ₤2.5 million in lighting costs.
People on the right have a long history of finding creative ways to be fiscally responsible. Why spend money that doesnʼt have to be spent?
3. Supported the Military
Governments finally embraced daylight savings time to help the troops during World War I. In Britain, coal was needed for the war effort, so it needed to be saved at home. To that end, they grabbed an extra hour of daylight in the morning to save on an hour of fuel needed for lighting at night.
Sacrificing for our military? Sounds like a right wing plot.
4. Supported by Big Business
Big business was definitely a supporter of daylight savings time. When the United States was considering its repeal in 1919, Sidney Colgate (yes, like the toothpaste) testified before Congress. Colgate argued that daylight savings should remain as it was as the adjusted schedule saved factories like his significant amounts of money. Unfortunately, congress didnʼt listen, and the repeal went ahead.
If any given thing is supported by big business, you know those conservatives are behind it.
5. Supported by Wall Street
When daylight savings time was repealed, New York City went ahead and kept it. One of the main reasons was so that they would not be another hour behind the stock exchange in London.
Uh oh, not those Wall Street types. Like the dastardly curs that they are, they wanted to compete in a global marketplace. We all know who likes competition, donʼt we? Do I really have to say it?
6. Supported Statesʼ Rights
In 1966, when daylight savings time was brought back in America, the federal government let the states decide whether or not to adopt it.
Letting states decide for themselves rather than imposing edicts from on top? It doesnʼt get much more conservative than that.
What do you think? Are you convinced? Conspiracy theories have taken root on less, have they not?
