Excuse me if I’m wrong (I’m a 90s baby), but I’m pretty sure I’ve heard “Kitty Carpet” was actually a turn on for a lot of guys back in the day. Yes, pubic hair. Nowadays, it seems like my generation is all about Brazilian waxes. Yep, everything off.
Maybe you’re too cool to get with the times, but if you recently shaved and regret it, no worries. “Kitty Carpet” is here to save the day. Just slap this toupee on your cooch, Mrs. Downstairs, Pikachu, or whatever you want to call it!
- Perfect for: misbehaved shaves, unveiled va-jay-jays & botched Brazilians
- Hilarious joke gift for white elephant exchange
- Amazon Prime eligible (free delivery for Prime members)
I know, what the hell, right? The carpet doesn’t always need to match the drapes. Christmas is here, and that means you can buy an $8 Christmas tree-shaped Kitty Carpet. Just be careful what you put under your Christmas tree, ladies. No one wants a gross gift that just keeps on giving.
How to Use the Kitty Carpet
- Trim the Kitty Carpet to the desired shape.
- Peel one Quick Fix Stick and stick it to the non-fuzzy side of Kitty Carpet.
- Place Kitty Carpet where you want it.
You can find the faux fur toupee on Amazon. (No actual kitties were harmed. All faux fur!) The Kitty Carpet measures 3.5 inches wide on top and 4.5 inches long. Add this to your Amazon wishlist today to make your Christmas getaway a little more exciting. Customer reviews are hilarious, y’all. I’m cackling. I might have to order the red heart for Valentine’s Day or the Shamrock for St. Patricks’ Day.
- Comes with one sheet of quick fix sticks
- Bachelorette party gift idea for games
- Faux fur made in China Quick Fix Sticks made in the United States
Kitty Carpet says gone are the days of picking your pubes off the bathroom floor to make your own merkin. You can finally be the prodigal hippie or French-web-footed prostitute you’ve always hoped to be. Experience life, girls!
Be sure to check out the other options! You can find natural pink, the carpet matches the drapes, and Michael Jackson’s hair.
For more funny gag gifts for women, check out Amazon.